


A Song That Sings You

by the_genderman



Series: My 2020 MCU Kink Bingo Fics [7]
Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Almost Pining, Gen, Nebula (Marvel) Needs a Hug, Slice of Life, Touch-Starved, mention of Gamora/Peter Quill, pre-slash Nebula/Mantis, what is love?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-20
Updated: 2020-02-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:00:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22808263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_genderman/pseuds/the_genderman
Summary: For Nebula’s whole life, touch has brought pain. Beaten, broken down, rebuilt, turned into a dealer of death. Why is it that Mantis makes her want something more than all that?
Relationships: Gamora & Nebula (Marvel)
Series: My 2020 MCU Kink Bingo Fics [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1608199
Comments: 2
Kudos: 12
Collections: MCU Kink Bingo Round 4





	A Song That Sings You

**Author's Note:**

> 2020 MCU Kink Bingo square B-4: Character is Touch Starved  
> Title is part of a lyric from Days of the New “Weapon and the Wound”

“Sister?” Nebula turns towards Gamora at the breakfast table. They’ve been speaking more of late, but they couldn’t quite be called _close_ yet. “I have a question which I hope you can answer.”

Gamora sets her utensils down and turns to Nebula, giving her her whole focus. “What _kind_ of a question?” she responds slowly, voice still carrying a tinge of not-unwarranted distrust.

“The Terran. Do you love him?” Nebula asks. She tilts her head slightly to one side.

“I suppose so?” Gamora answers, her eyes slightly unfocused as she thinks.

“How did you know?” Nebula asks quickly, cutting in as soon as Gamora has gotten the sentence out. “What does ‘love’ feel like? How do you know?”

“What does love feel like? That’s hard to answer,” Gamora replies, raising one eyebrow quizzically. “I suppose it feels like warmth inside you. When you love someone, it feels like friendship, but different. Stronger in parts. With Peter… there are times when he can be _frustrating_ , irritating, but I enjoy his company. When he annoys me, I don’t feel like I want to kill him? I don’t know. There are times when I wish I could push Rocket out of an airlock, but I don’t do it because we’re friends. With Peter, I feel… _more_. Like, if someone else pushed him out of an airlock, I would feel the pain of his absence. I would grieve him. Why are you asking _me_ this?”

“You seemed like the one who would be able to give me the best answer,” Nebula shrugs.

Gamora looks skeptical. She resettles her chair to better face Nebula.

“Consider the rest of this crew,” Nebula huffs. “Who else _could_ I ask? Drax? Rocket? The _tree_?”

“You _do_ have a point,” Gamora says with a chuckle. “Can I ask you why you’re asking me this?”

“No reason,” Nebula says, suddenly evasive. “I was just curious. It’s not something I’m familiar with.”

“I’m learning, same as you,” Gamora replies. “Now finish your breakfast before it gets cold. The wrufruit mash gets unpleasantly gelatinous if it sits too long. Peter’s not the best cook, but he tries. I do love that about him.”

Nebula gives a noncommittal grunt and prods her breakfast with her spoon. It wiggles and returns to its original shape. “I think it already has.”

\-----------------

It’s times like this that Nebula is very glad she had been allowed her own single-occupancy quarters, a place where she could have the quiet to think. It was small, barely more than a closet, but she could sleep comfortably on her feet, and it was a refuge of privacy on this ship full of idiots. Well, maybe not everyone was an idiot. Gamora certainly wasn’t, but she could be irritating as only family could. Peter was very much an idiot. Rocket was very irritating but smarter than he would admit, which meant most of the time he was just an idiot. Mantis… perhaps Mantis was just naïve. Mantis had been on her mind _very_ frequently of late.

It had been a week ago, maybe a little earlier. Mantis had touched her arm as they passed in a narrow corridor. Nebula had heard that Mantis could read emotions, read one’s innermost soul, with just a touch. That was not ideal, so she made a point of staying just out of arm’s reach. She wasn’t going to be rude—Gamora had made her swear not to be _too_ rude to her friends—but neither was she going to allow an empath free access to her secrets. Nonetheless, it had happened. Maybe the Milano had hit a patch of turbulence, maybe Rocket and Peter were fighting over the ship’s controls again, but whatever had caused it, she and Mantis had been passing in the corridor and the sudden jolt of the ship had caused Mantis to stumble and grab onto her arm for balance. 

They had paused, briefly connected. Mantis had looked at her, eyes wide, and Nebula had frozen. Mantis’s antennae glowed as she read her. Nebula had expected to see fear, disgust, maybe even pity on Mantis’s face. Instead, it had been something far more difficult to read. Well, maybe there had been a little apprehension, but there had also been _more_ there. Acceptance? Something vaguely approaching pity, but without the bitter taste pity carried? Sad, but not sad? _Understanding_? How could someone like that _understand_ her and everything she had done? Mantis’s hand had lingered on her arm, small and warm and compassionate before withdrawing. Mantis had averted her eyes and thanked her for catching her before she fell. 

Mantis had _thanked_ her. She hadn’t shied away, afraid of all the horrors Nebula carried within her. She had touched her arm, felt her secrets, and thanked her for being there for her, in whatever little capacity it had been.

Nebula thinks back to that brief but meaningful touch. She wants _more_. No one touches her. Touch had always been pain, both giving and receiving. She had endured much pain in her life, and meted out far more than she had endured. She had been conditioned to seek pleasure only in the pain of others. She had been careful, not allowing anyone to get close to her, not allowing anyone to touch her. But this? This had felt… nice. And so her thoughts had kept returning, again and again, to Mantis and what it might be like to touch and be touched without pain.

Perhaps she would like to get to know Mantis better. Naïve though she may be, she is pleasant to think about. Nebula’s hand moved reflexively to her arm where Mantis’s hand had touched her. Yes. She _would_ like to get to know her better.


End file.
